When I first met my husband he was actively contemplating a path toward a monastic life. The words of Thomas Merton echoed loudly to him, “We do not want to be beginners, but let us be convinced of the fact that we will never be anything but beginners, all our life!” It strikes me that not only do WE not want to be beginners, but others around us including our colleagues and our clients also do not want us to be beginners. That is understandable when someone is paying good money for your expert opinion or skill.
What I think has been lost in a blind pursuit of the expert opinion and the consulting relationship comes down to three powerful words: “I don’t know.” Obviously I am not saying we should pay good money to someone who doesn’t have a clue what he or she is doing. I not only am paid for consulting services, but I rely on a bevvy of consultants on a myriad of subjects. Of course we seek out experts in our field of need. What I long for is the appropriate pause when asked a question and we don’t know the answer.
Our society puts pressure on people to know how to do everything within their field, which is simply not possible. Not only are none of us old enough to know it all, the body of knowledge is constantly growing, shifting and being broken wide open with technological advances that happen while we sleep. It seems to be socially and professionally acceptable to say you can do something in a meeting and then go back to the office and “figure it out”. I believe this pattern collapses after a time and is ultimately “figured out”.
As an active principle at my agency, I am constantly called on for my expert opinion in all things marketing. I am called upon to answer in front of a room of C-level executives, my own employees, various stakeholders and even interns. Inevitably there are questions that exceed my expertise. If I blindly follow the path to covering up my unknowing or blindly accept the pressure from those peering eyes I will step right into dishonesty. This dishonesty ultimately hides the true expertise and genius you bring to the table. Your powerful skills will be overlooked as they lose the basis from which they could have stood out.
As an agency owner I need to reflect on our culture and evaluate how “ok” we are when someone doesn’t know something. Even when we have carefully carved out a culture where it is acceptable to experiment and fail, present the truth of what you know and what you don’t know, and keep the creative juices flowing, we can have employees come in an pollute that environment. Typically these are “high flyers” that may come with a specific skill that is highly valued. Over time, however, you may test those waters by seeing how able they are to finally admit when they have reached their limits. Everyone has them, so when an employee can’t communicate that limit, red flags should be going off inside your head. You are probably on some pretty false ground. It is important to keep tabs on this aspect as a constantly changing measure of professional authenticity. Unchecked, it will blow up in your face. Trust me.
When we fake that we know something we don’t, give into the pressure that others want us to know more than we do, or allow others to fake it, we not only disappoint ourselves, but ultimately those around us.
Personally I am overwhelmed by the thought of how much I have learned in this past year. Embracing that and bringing it to the table for my clients sets the precedence for an authentic partnership. The true humility you can demonstrate when you get in touch with how much better your work is now than even a year ago can cause a client to truly appreciate your approach and constant improvement.
It’s tricky, but somehow we have to grow and learn professionally while still maintaining our expert status. How have you managed to do this along the way?
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